When my husband and I first watched our wedding video it warmed my heart to relive one of the very best days of our lives. But I also had a lot of criticism for myself– mostly trivial things like the way my hair was pinned in one spot or how I wish I’d prepared a […]
When You Can’t Do Date Night
Scheduled date nights are often prescribed for couples to keep their relationships strong. I don’t think this is a bad thing— I think it’s most often a very good thing! Creating uninterrupted, quality time and space to spend with those we love is essential. Nobody wants their marriage to become a mere roommate-situation. Scheduled date […]
On Loving Your Children Without Worshipping Them
A new religion in our American culture is rapidly gaining devout followers. Its followers are typically between the ages of about twenty-two and fifty and there are generally more women than men. This religion does not seem to produce much satisfaction or peace. Many of its followers end up frazzled, stressed, and scrupulous, and find their marriages […]
The Very Thought of You
It seems to be a generally accepted fate that people who fell in love will fall out of it and that romance within long-term relationships or marriage is bound to die. The usual advice to try to prevent this goes something like: try to make time for each other. Set monthly/weekly date nights. And certainly, […]
In Sickness
People seem to assume that marriage causes suffering. But that is too simplistic. Marriage does not cause suffering; life causes suffering. What makes married people unique is that, by vowing to be one in all things, they inevitably vow to be one in their suffering. This means they can’t run from suffering. They must endure […]
It’s My Body, But That’s Not the Point
Unlike my husband and toddler, my love language is not primarily physical affection. I need to be near those I love, but I don’t necessarily need a whole lot of touch. Many nights in bed I naturally graviate to my own cool space once it’s time to sleep, but no matter what, both my husband […]
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